@tweethard says, "Thanks for listening!"

SHOW 68: Rhubarb Ahoy / 49min / November 6, 2010

Kris and David broadcast LIVE from the 2010 New England Webcomics Weekend after passing the audio signal through the voice box of an abandoned Russian submarine and letting a squirrel sit on it for a while.

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@robynneblume Every lightningmas I go outside in a metal suit and hold up an umbrella, and just stand like that for an hour. Take that, believers! #tmh

@ashleywr @robynneblume what are you going to say next that Back To The Future isn’t possible? Lightning is REAL! #tmh

@robynneblume @ashleywr BttF is SCIENCE FICTION. Just because it is AWESOME it doesn’t mean it’s REALISTIC. #tmh

@Sekelsky @tweethard #tmh Kris just wears the burlap sacks from the brocolli he buys

@Kouban It should really be called “I can’t believe I’M not butter!” Products that talk to the consumer are more popular #tmh

@Hamiltwan I Want to Believe (that it is butter) #TMH

@Albedo12 I Can Quite Easily Believe It’s Not Butter #tmh

@Albedo12 Kris is The Font Whisperer #tmh

@ThisIsBenSilver With alchemy, we could turn all this Mislead into MisGOLD! #TMH #NEWW

@Albedo12 The accordion was created through Weird Al-chemy #tmh

@Kouban The accordion was invented by a blacksmith who wanted to be a musician. #tmh

@caldy Accordians were originally just a clever way to destroy snakes. #TMH

@docsigma Bagpipes are the severed reproductive organs of an accordion. #TMH

@nebadger My mom is listening and ashamed of us all #tmh

@Kouban Even when #tmh is disastrous, it’s fantastic.

@jellybeansniper When is TMH over, anyways? I’m probably gonna sit in my car until then.

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SHOW 50: The Most Disgusting Astronaut / 56min / June 23, 2010

Kris and David report live from the scene of the TMH book release party in Portland, Oregon, going the extra mile to insulate your attic from ghosts, incinerate your childhood keepsakes, sell you a bat on a pizza, and eat spoiled foreign food for your amusement.

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@robynneblume I love attics. I want to live in one. And it will be full of spider webs, but the spiders will not be poisonous. #tmh

@richmagahiz They remind you of the years you spent in Attica #tmh

@kcbanner As a child we constantly had to defend ourselves from roaming asbestos addicts. The hardest part was that they were fireproof. #tmh

@HenryNTodd An attic is a house-pyramid for collecting psychic waste energy of the occupants. You want that stuff just going into the atmosphere? #tmh

@JessePB Ultimate Topping: Pizza topped with pizza-stuffed bats #tmh

@richmagahiz And for the vegans there could be fruit bats #tmh

@Plustenstrength @tweethard #tmh once a homeless man was making balloon animals for everyone on my bus ride. i got a balloon dog.

@g33ksq33k #TMH One time when I took a bus, somebody pooped on one of the seats. It was awesome.

@robynneblume This is not encouraging me. I’m terrified of buses. #tmh

@NickyTheRat The most elite position is Ghostbustersbuster. #tmh

@Nateman Buster Busters are the internal affairs of the Buster community. Feared and reviled. #tmh

@jplaub Ghosts, dinosaurs, dreams, this is the quintessential #tmh

@SamGraebner @tweethard This is the episode where everyone dies from japanese food poisoning. #TMH

@BlackFelos My Hiragana’s rusty, but I’m pretty sure all those labels said ‘Ghost Paste’. #tmh

@Writersblade I wonder how much of this stuff needed to be cooked? #tmh

@moomjin @tweethard #tmh I think you guys are eating ingredients. It’s like eating baking powder or olive oil straight.

@Kouban And don’t worry, guys, I’m sure something in there is the antidote #tmh

TMH COMES TO PDX - June 23rd!

On Wednesday, June 23rd, we’ll be having the OFFICIAL TMH BOOK RELEASE PARTY in Portland, Oregon!  In conjunction with Meredith Gran’s new book There Are No Stars In Brooklyn, we’ll be throwing a rockin’ party from 6-10 PM (the TMH show starts around 7:30). And believe us, this is one you won’t want to miss.

Admission to the party and show is free, but we’ll be signing copies of the TMH book (and Wondermark, Chainsawsuit and Starslip books) so bring yer money. Or, just come and freeload some complimentary laughings! That is fine too.





Come, say hello, enjoy the show, take embarrassing pictures of us, and really just enjoy a fine night of being social and friendly and forgetting all your cares. This will be our only Portland appearance for at least a year and maybe ever so come on out!

p.s. for a special sneak peek inside the tmh book click here (shhh!!!)

available now for only $16 at our topatoco store

SHOW 45: Moneycubes / 1hr 11min / May 1, 2010

Kris and David probe the world’s finest minds on the MIT campus in Cambridge, MA, imparting wisdom from the year 4000. The time-traveling duo examines bee armor, clones musicians, requests injections, and explains how fat is money.

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@beowuuf @tweethard I will manufacture miniature longbows just in case the bee armour of the future needs to be defeated in a metal-less world #tmh

@robynneblume @beowuuf I’m worried that the bees will steal these longbows and turn them against us. #tmh

@beowuuf @robynneblume Curses! We need to develop large longbows, that interface tiny arrows. That’s 5k technology :( #tmh

@Flashfic Net Me Harder has a literal captive audience #tmh

@robynneblume It’s blurry, but I think I saw @malki summing an integral? Does he know what he’s doing at all? #tmh

SHOW 43: Corndog Paninis / 43min / April 17, 2010

Kris and David address an audience of themselves at TMH Live Chicago, broadcasting from the lovely Sheraton Hotel. The lads roll with punches, hold a trivia contest, and in Ask Me Harder, explain all about Chicago politics, electricity, and the old-time pillow-gifting custom.

Download the MP3 (but to be honest this one gains a lot from watching the video)

Kouban Ideally, a hotel room should be completely filled with pillows so you can swim through them to your bed, which is an enormous pillow. #tmh


Tyk_Tok @tweethard “embroider the pillow, or sleep with the fishes.”



Kouban @gameking218 His stat block states that @krisstraub gives double Combat Advantage to any Malki flanking him. #tmh #dnd #imanerd


ProphetEKA @tweethard It’s Bean great, guys. I have Bean entertained. Bean. #tmh #bean

SHOW 40: Gargamel’s Sword / 48min / March 12, 2010

Kris and David address the multitudes at TMH LIVE Seattle, explaining the secrets of cobblers, testing the knowledge of audience members, appraising valuable antiques, and revealing the Church of Tweet Me Harder.  The show was sponsored by TopatoCo!

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Video by Mike Gaston

spastikchuwawa Stop makin’ jokes about cobblers #tmh


guigar Watching Kris fondle an old bag is surprisingly entertaning #tmh

AdamRB #tmh the [double-sided] bible needs to be an ever-repeating story. So the end of it leads back in to the beginning. The story never ends.

cephalopod_gal Gonna do my #tmh rosary. “Hail Malki, full of eggs…”

jplaub “Our Twitter search for #tmh, who art on the Internet, frequent be thy API calls.”

MrBildango In the name of The Harder, the Tweet, and the Holy Me-Harder. #tmh

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Limited TMH Posters now available!

Now available: limited stock of TMH25The Live Show – special edition posters! Did you watch the stream online? Did you download the video or listen to the podcast later? THEN YOU WERE THERE. Commemorate the event with our photo-quality, 12"x18" show posters!

Every poster is signed by both Kris and David and ships immediately upon ordering. Quit yer dallyin’ and click here to order!

SHOW 25: Phone Van / 1hr 11min / November 14, 2009

Kris and David take the stage for the first-ever Tweet Me Harder LIVE in Hollywood, CA, featuring special guests Fake Stan Lee and Real Dave Kellett. The gang fears spiders, reinvents mobile banking, infuses everything with vitamins, chooses their ghost rules, and visits the Voltron family.

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Download the QuickTime video (838 MB)

Storyline: “Emirates Capital” part 5 of 8 (but can be listened to out-of-context)

Photo above by lobraumeister

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TMH LIVE » November 14, 2009 in Hollywood, CA

Tweet Me Harder Live

Join David Malki ! and Kris Straub for the first LIVE on-stage performance of Tweet Me Harder, on November 14, 2009 at 8 PM at The Complex Theatre in Hollywood, CA – with special appearances by Fake Stan Lee and Dave Kellett, friends of Tweet Me Harder (but not each other).

Open to the public, TMH LIVE is free to attend. Come out and show your support! You can also share the event with your friends and RSVP on our Facebook event page.

Note to Antarctic scientists: if sunny Southern California is too far away for you, you can also tune in here on the site to watch a live stream of the show.